A New Year is here,  and with it comes great excitement and anticipation for whats in store.

2015 was a good year for me. And by that I don't mean there weren't any struggles or obstacles to overcome because... there sure was! It wasn't perfect, but it was a pretty awesome year. A lot was accomplished and I grew significantly.

In February, I went to a conference in Texas called IF: Gathering (AH-MAZING!) There was so much I took away from that conference. But the biggest thing i took away (that basically became the catalyst that would set the course for how my year would go) came from just one little line in a song.

The song was "Good Good Father" by House Fires. (I'm sure you have heard it  as it's probably one of the biggest worship songs of 2015, if you are a church goer)

The chorus of the song goes:

"You're a good good father, its who You are,it's who You are and I'm loved by You it's who I am, it's who I am..."

Singing that song I remember thinking about how even in the midst of the most heartbreaking seasons of my life I could declare that in it all and through it all God was good and was faithful. I have no problem saying it because not only do I believe it, but I have experienced it. He is faithful. He is good. This is true and has always been true.

But that second part...

"I'm loved by you, It's who I am...?"  Yes, also true... He does love me. I know that. "Who I am" though? That means, that should be a part of my identity right? If being loved by God is WHO I am, How am I living like that is true?

Answer: I really wasn't.

It's simple, I know, But for me it was mind blowing. I mean, I've been a Christian my whole life, come on! I know there is nothing I can do to "earn" God's love... basic Christianity 101. But here I was not fully accepting my identity, because somewhere a long the way, I started to believe the lie, that I didn't really deserve it?  What?  Crazy!

How could I have no problem telling people God loves them but somewhere a long the way stop believing it for myself? I imagine there are a lot of us church grown individuals out there who know a lot of stuff but, just don't walk it out.

Needless to say, it broke me, and in that moment, I chose to be even more intentional about change in my life. I decided to try and get out of my own way and over the course of the year, I was able to remove things in my life that were toxic and hindering. I began to walk in the confidence that, yeah, all those dreams,  passions and ideas I have, they are significant and important and, valid (Thank you, Lupita!). I chose brave and rejected fear. I began to believe that if everything falls apart, I don't need to strive and struggle to figure out who I am. My identity is not found in what I do or can do, but in who I truly am. One who is SO very loved by a ever so faithful, good, good, father.

And as I now reflect on this past year, I can't help but get a little emotional when I see all that God has done.Still a work in progress, But I'm pretty thankful for this year with all its growth, change, challenges and opportunities (all of which have brought me to this space).

While at this point  I do not know what my future looks like in 2016. I trust the one who says " I know the plans I have for you..."

If we all truly embrace who we are, see ourselves how God see's us,  set our eyes on Him, desiring to do His will. We can rest assured  that all of our lives, our plans, ideas, dreams, passions, hopes, EVERYTHING, it's all in Him, all in HIS hands. There is so much freedom in that!

SO, Happy 2016  friends! So excited for this next year and all the new things God is doing. May you dream big, hope more, trust more and live knowing you a truly loved!

 "For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland" - Isaiah 43:19

 

Melody